Patti

I remember the day Dr. H came in and told me I had cancer. I didn't know anyone that had cancer except for old people that died. So my response was to ask how long I had to live.

Later, I learned I would lose my hair. That's when I really lost it. Death when you are 16 is very unreal but losing your hair when you are 16 is devastating. You see, my hair was down to my waist. It was very difficult for me because my hair was who I was. It became my center of attention and I was determined not to lose it.

The doctors gave it a valiant effort. Dr. G had heard if you pack your head in ice it would help slow the process down. So we tried it. They even made a helmet for me. In the end, it didn't work. While all of this was going on, my chemo was silently doing its job and destroying the cancer cells. In the first two treatments my levels had been cut in half and there was a possibility of me surviving this. Something my parents were told not to expect.

On the day of my last round of chemo, I had lost my hair, my arm was burning from my IV, and I was down to 85 pounds. I was not feeling very lucky. At that point, I was sure it would never end. And I remember now a boy I met at the hospital. He asked me how many surgeries I had. I told him only one so far. He told me the was going in for this 13th. As he wheeled away in his wheelchair he told me to remember that no matter how bad it gets there will always be someone worse off than you. I never saw him again.

Well, my hair came back, only not blonde, but dark and wavy! My class elected me prom queen that year. Many things have happened to me since. I have had cancer return two times. In the middle of all that, I was married and have two beautiful children, against the odds! Although I live with some side effects of all I have been through, there must be some reason for me to still be here. Whatever that reason may be, I sure hope I come through because it looks like I'm going to be hanging around here for awhile.

Endo dermal sinus tumor
Diagnosed at 16
Now 34

Reprinted with permission from the book "Kids with Courage."
"Kids with Courage" may be obtained by calling Wisconsin Clearinghouse at 800-322-1468.

No part of "Kids with Courage" may be reproduced in any way or by any means without permission in writing form from:
University of Wisconsin Comprehensive Cancer Center
K4/666 Clinical Science Center
600 Highland Avenue
Madison, WI 53792