Katie

Even as I sat down to write this, I can't say that I remember much, a few bits and pieces here and there... Others have helped me remember how it was right from the start... The bruises that seemed to grow and multiply; the first long ride down to Madison, In the back seat of the car. The first thing I noticed was the model of the hospital enclosed in the glass case in the lobby, it had tiny little cars, like in Mr. Roger's neighborhood. But, that was only after being mesmerized by the revolving doors. And that was just the beginning, of my first night in the hospital, My favorite places came to be the tiny gift shop, the cafeteria and you guessed it, the toy room. I remember watching the man with the unicycle ride back and forth from one side of the roof to the other.

Mostly the memories I have were the happier times.... My baby brother came to visit me, instead of me visiting him; I missed a dance recital or two, but that didn't keep me down, I put on my costume anyway and danced with my IV pole. Or the time that my aunt went for a walk with me and crashed my IV on the door that went to the sun porch. The time that I was really brave was when, for the first time, I stayed overnight all by myself. All the visitors and stuffed animals really piled up, but my favorite presents were the squirt guns. When I felt up to it, I'd crawl on my knees to the nurses station, pop up and squirt them. (I'm sure they loved me for that).

But the bad memories are few and far between... The spinal taps, so bad that I squeezed my little clown doll so tight, I thought his head might come off. Or the icky brown swab stuff to clean my "buddy" (hickman) with. And how could I forget the awful tasting medicine and prednisone cravings with my infamous chip-dip story. The thing is, I was so little I don't even remember any pain. Or much else for that matter, but I was still scared.

I don't wish what happened to me and my family on anyone ever. I could never have pulled through without my entire family and a few special people...Thanks to Peggy, Sharon, Andrea, Nola, John, Dr. Finley. Every once in a while I look back and can't believe that it was me, and that I'm still here. I'm here. I've learned that no matter what obstacle is thrown at you, you can get through it. Anything is possible. Anything.

Leukemia
Diagnosed at 3
Now 15

Reprinted with permission from the book "Kids with Courage."
"Kids with Courage" may be obtained by calling Wisconsin Clearinghouse at 800-322-1468.

No part of "Kids with Courage" may be reproduced in any way or by any means without permission in writing form from:
University of Wisconsin Comprehensive Cancer Center
K4/666 Clinical Science Center
600 Highland Avenue
Madison, WI 53792